How am I doing?
- The IRS still hasn’t finished processing New Way’s 501(c)3 application, so we don’t yet have our non-profit bulk mail permit, so our advertising costs for our launch campaign are going to be higher than planned.
- I think I may be coming down with something between a cold and a flu.
- Since adding a puppy to our household, I have had less sleep every night.
- I have no idea what I’m doing.
- I still miss my father.
- I am still processing all sorts of confusing thoughts and feelings about life and death.
- I am far away from my siblings and my mother.
- I am not as good a husband or father as I would like to be.
- I am easily distracted.
- I am heavier than I want to be.
- I am becoming increasingly aware of my own mortality.
- I keep fighting the same spiritual battles over and over.
- I am connected with an organization that is experiencing simultaneous financial, cultural, and structural crises.
- I regularly struggle to understand the big questions, let alone their answers.
- I treat my dark side like a pet.
- I’m tired.
But on the other hand…
- I have an amazingly solid marriage to a wonderful person.
- Every one of my kids is a healthy, intelligent, loving, happy person.
- I live in a good house in a nice neighborhood in a fun city in a privileged nation in an amazing time in a beautiful world.
- I am living out a life’s dream, and not for the first time.
- I am in constant dialogue with amazing people all around me.
- Our puppy is really, really cute. And sweet. And (for a puppy) quite easygoing.
- I don’t need to worry about personal finances.
- I love and am loved by many people.
- I can play music any time I like.
- I live near The Salt Lick, Torchy’s Tacos, and a hundred good coffee shops.
- I’ve been making good progress on New Way’s website.
- I’m excited by what seems to me to be a new wave swelling far off shore in the broad spiritual movement that is the New Church.
- I like what I do.
- I have a pool.
- I am rarely too cold anymore.
- I had a great family Christmas.
- I mostly can make my own hours.
- I am regularly amazed, enlightened and moved by what I learn from God’s Word.
So, all in all, I guess…what?
I guess life doesn’t work that way. It’s not a balance sheet, or a see-saw, or a list. So what is it? Well, mostly it’s a “now” that’s heavily complicated by a no-longer existant past and a never quite here future.